3/11/08 – 9/11/08

If football be the food of love, play on,
Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,
The appetite may sicken, and so die.

Chuck Woody’s adaptation of Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night (circa 2008)

I’ve said it many times before but truly this was one momentus week don’t ya think?!

A week full historical and hysterical poignancy.

First a certain Black “Muslim” ancestrally from Kenya via Hawaii by way of Indonesia somehow, improbably makes it all the way to the White House, and not as Head Janitor but as Head Of State.

Cue a cornerstore stampede as folks up and down the country fight tooth and nail buying up inordinate amounts of the NY Times. Not for sentiment, no not these plucky opportunists, they were selling them on ebay for anything up to $400 a pop!

Now I’m no Wall St analyst but, if you buy a commodity for 50¢ and sell at $400 within the hour(!!) that surely has to go down as one of the biggest profit margins even known!! Crisis? What friggin crisis?!?! Methinks the American Dream is alive and kickin’.

Back on this side of the pond in N5, the state of affairs reaches hysteria as the Stokegate affair takes on near apocalyptic proportions.

It seems the whole nation and his mut believe Mr Wenger may have passed his sell-by date and should pack his things. At least when we lose to ManUre we can say it was to be expected as we’re managerless and in disarray……Wednesday night, a return meeting with Fener and the opportunity to address the current melancholy. A chance to put right the wrongs of the past seven days. The prospect to fill our boots against a team whom we had previously dispatched with the minimum of fuss. A welcome occasion to restore the feelgood factor just in time for the visit of Nancy, Barbie and Red Noise looming over the horizon on the coming weekend.

Outcome? Not good. Not good at all. The less said about the tepid 0-0 draw the better.

AW decides to turn up the notch on the siege mentality taking effect around the squad. But few outside the club decide to bite.

Indeed, concerned by the media onslaught Chairman Peter Hill-Wood sees fit to send a message of assurance via the Daily Star: “…we’re not happy with the last 2 or 3 games… but to suggest we have a problem is complete and utter rubbish” some in the media suggests a glossed over version of the dreaded ‘vote of confidence?’.

Well, if that’s the case let’s just sack the Professor and replace him with Obama. Better still, let’s go one better and replace him with a donkey. Apparently a donkey is just as good as Obama and would certainly come much cheaper…

I cannot remember the last time I’ve come across so many gooners with a defeatist attitude before a game. Even on goonersworld folks are preparing for the worst and hoping for mercy that the Mancs spare us too much embarrassment and leave us with our dignity at least.

No RvP or Ade, Sagna, TW14 and Willie nursing knocks, Tommy and Dudu still out with long term injuries. And to top it off we gotta depend on Bendy to lead the line. What chance did our boys have against a juggernaut seemingly relishing the prospect of aiding and abetting our slow and painful demise?

“RUMOURS ABOUT MY DEATH HAVE BEEN GREATLY EXAGGERATED” – Samuel Longhorne Clemens (or Mark Twain to you and me)

Who could blame AW if he came and said those very words to the Press with a certain smugness and glint in his eyes? But unfortunately that just isn’t his style. But oh how I wish it was!

2-1 against the hated ManUre! Outstanding performances around the pitch with the obvious MOTM being Nasri but, Diaby, Clichy and even Captain Willie gave enormous contributions.

Even Red Noise told Sky Sports “it was fantasy football… playground stuff” and more surprising was his humility and grace in saying “… sometimes you have to hold your hands up and say that if you’re going to get beaten, make sure it’s by a team that plays good football. Arsenal play good stuff”


On GW I’d like to extend my warmest regards and say congrats to ADS and wife who recently got hitched. They’ve even managed to have their first fight as man and wife: should bacon go with syrup. I’m sure it’ll be the first of many. Altogether now… Awwwwww

Lil Mo tries fake-tan and takes a break from sunbeds. In his infinite wisdom he convinced himself a change is as good as a break. Needless to say it didn’t quite go as expected. Why bother man? Everyone knows you only get 30 minutes of sunlight per year North of the Border!

ScottishLass decides to start a thread ‘Hottest male on the Planet’. Let me once again reiterate my refusal to having any of my photos posted in this thread.

Ozgooner gets lovesick and decides to tell-all about his love affair with The Arsenal. And I thought all Aussies were the manly type????

Welcome goes out to a couple of new members to the forum, big whaddup goes out to Midfield who sadly comes from a family of Scousers, and thumbs up to gigi’s pal thebish who’s a Trotters fan looking for footballing enlightenment. Takes a big man to admit your shortcomings my man.

You’ve both come to the right place!!

Stick around and make yourselves at home.

So I think it’s apt I close this week’s chapter by leaving it to the Prof to wrap things up:

“It was a very important result. I’m not sure what the reaction would have been if we’d lost… The performance was a reminder of the spirit, determination and attitude we have, which cannot be questioned now. We had one accident, against Stoke [well 3 actually but who’s counting, eh?], which provoked a hysterical reaction that I didn’t understand. Today we won against a great ManUre team, who are champions of Europe, but above the result was a fantastic football game because both teams played in the right sprit.” – Sunday Times